RUSSIA ESTABLISHES A YETI RESEARCH INSTITUTION!

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The Daily Mail has reported that Russia is setting up a university research institute to study the Yeti after a spate of claimed recent sightings in Siberia.

Scientists say they have found 15 witnesses in the past year who gave statements that they saw the so-called “Abominable Snowman” in one remote area. Dr. Igor Burtsev, who conducted an expedition last summer and will head the new institute at Kemerovo State University, said:

“We spoke to local residents. They told us Yetis were stealing their animals.”

The academic claims around 30 YETIS – or ALMAS as they are known in Russia — live in a remote region of Mount Shoria in southern Siberia. He strongly denies accusations that the “sightings” are a bizarre ruse to attract tourists to the far-flung region.

Reports say the two-legged creatures are heavy-set, covered I black or reddish fur, approximately 7-feet tall and resemble bears. That having been said, there are additional reports that suggest these creatures are less like prototypical HAIRY HOMINIDS and more like the classic image of the human-like Neanderthal. Burtsev supports this theory.

One villager, Afanasy Kiskorov, even claimed to scientists that he rescued a Yeti on a hunting trip a year ago. The creature was screaming in fear after falling into a swollen mountain river. As his fellow-hunters froze in astonishment, Kiskorov had the presence of mind to extend a thick branch toward the beast:

“(The) strange creature, looking like a huge man, tried several times to get out of water and to stand up on both feet, but dropped into the water each time and was howling… the creature clutched (the branch) to it and crawled to the bank.”

The Yeti allegedly then ran off.  This sighting took place in the remote Tashtagol district of the Kemerovo Region, only accessible by helicopter.  Sadly, no one on hand managed to procure any photographic evidence during this bizarre rescue operation.

Burtsev stated that the university’s primary goals will be to establish contact with one of the creatures and pool the knowledge and resources of all the respectable scientist currently engaged in research into this extraordinary phenomenon:

“In Russia there are about 30 authoritative scientists who are engaged in studying the phenomenon of the ‘Abonimable Snowman’. All of them will be integrated into this institute.”

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